New Year Promises...

If you know me in real life you'd know I can be rash, unpredictable and a bit crazy.  You would also know I'm not real diligent.  I have a bulldog tenacity, when it suits.  When I don't really want to do something that tenacity floats away.  I'm also an overachiever.  Every year I make a huge list of 'year end resolutions'. And do I stick to it?  Nope.  But this year is going to be different.  Attainable.  Things I actually need to do.  Not just things I might want to do...  So,

I Promise...

1- to never forget Yahweh again                     
This year (and the year before) has been a year of trials.  I don't understand why they're happening, but they are.  During all of it I forgot about Yahweh.  About his unfailing love.  About his promises.  Instead I 'disowned' him.  I blamed him.  I hated him for allowing this to happen.  I turned my back on him and fell into a deep depression.  A depression I'm still struggling with.  I learned to hate.  I turned bitter.  I grew rebellious.  I hated life itself.  But, I had an encounter with Yahweh.  And I turned away, again.  I had yet another encounter.  And I rejected it.  Why?  I don't know.  But someone who has turned into my mentor opened my eyes.  So, in return, my first resolution is to never forget again.

2- to wake up at 4am to have my Quiet Time           
 I know one of the reasons me and Yahweh aren't close is because I very rarely ever study his word.  This year that's going to change.  My favorite time is when it's dark out so what I plan on doing (starting tomorrow) is going outside to sit with the animals while I do my Quiet Time.  The only time I'm ever really at peace is when I'm outside and the stars are out.  I don't know why but it's kind of like the song 'Stars' by Switchfoot.

But when I look at the stars,
when I look at the stars,
when I look at the stars I see someone else

When I look at the stars,
the stars, I feel like myself

I really relate to that.  When I look at the stars I see someone else and I feel like myself.  I've considered turning nocturnal but I don't think my family would be too thrilled ;).

3- to pray                                            
My prayer life has always been very lax.  I know Yahweh wants to talk to me and I want to talk to him.  I need to remember just to shoot little prayers up to him of thankfulness and just wanting to talk to him.  When I was doing that (very short lived) I was happy and content.  I want to have that feeling always.

4- to apply my bulldog tenacity to every part of life 
Like I said before, me and diligence no longer go hand-in-hand.  But I want us to be BF's.  By the end of the year I'll let y'all know how it's going ;).

5- to become the best horseman I can be               
I feel like I've let my horses down and my horsemanship slip.  I decided that Parelli is not for me.  I want a relationship like the one Carolyn Resnick has with her horses.  So, I'm starting 'The Carolyn Resnick Method'.  I feel like that will restore the relationship with my horses and help me to want to hang out with my horses again...


In 2011 I'm going to take charge of my life and become the best person I can be.  And be as close to Yahweh as I can...